So does what happened on the first half of Monday. I was scheduled to take one of the two A+ certification tests. I couldn't sleep the night before until close to time to get up, so I just stayed awake to make sure I didn't oversleep. I couldn't eat because being sleep-deprived makes me nauseated. I took four buses and one ferry and walked a fair bit in the rain and mud, over a span of five hours, one way, to Seattle to take the test, studying on and off the whole time. (I did manage to eat a granola bar on the ferry.) I missed a couple of buses because of a miscalculation or a mistake or something, and I hadn't worked in that much extra time because I was already getting up at 8:15, and I made it to the Pearson Professional Center precisely on time. Their rules say that you have to arrive at least 15 minutes before your scheduled test time or you can't take the test. So I'd run the last few feet to the building, taken the elevator to the fourth floor, and burst into the lobby at exactly fifteen minutes before my test time.

The guy told me it would be fine and I was super relieved. And then I gave him my signed photo IDs, which both said "Heather Melissa McClish." I was registered under "Melissa McClish," the name I've always gone by, the name my parents decided to call me by. I hate my first name. I'd made extra sure that my IDs would have my middle name on them because I knew it was on the test registration. The guy looked at them, asked me if I had any other signed IDs with just my first name on them, called CompTIA, spent several minutes on hold, talked to them a little, hung up, and informed me that I had to re-register and reschedule both my A+ tests under my legal first name, and that I couldn't take the test today. He was unsure but optimistic about whether it would be necessary to pay for the vouchers again. He told me to call CompTIA, and that he was sorry. I told him it wasn't his fault, left the lobby, spent a few minutes being really upset.

I caught a random bus that said it was going downtown. Only half paid attention to or cared about where I was going, got off at a random place when I saw Puget Sound nearby-ish, followed streets toward the water until I got to the ferry terminal. Took the 3 PM home, ate another granola bar slowly with lots of water, felt exhausted and disheartened, but I wasn't that upset anymore. Came home, went and hung out with Brett and Austin and Sam and Alexis and Nik and Kyle and Tyler for a few days. I'm not alone. That makes everything better. I'm still pissed at CompTIA for their stupid policy, I'm kind of annoyed with my parents for all the little hang-ups I've had over my preferred name and my legal first name, and I still have to straighten the A+ registration out. And then when I get them rescheduled I have to do this all over again, and I have to keep studying in the meantime, and then I have to actually pass the tests. But being able to be around friends makes all of this crap more bearable.

#SOPA and #PIPA would be disasters for the internet. And the #internet is incredibly important to me. It's my primary source of knowledge, it's the way I keep in touch with those I'm close to when I'm not physically around them (which is constantly for me, as I have friends on both coasts), it makes me laugh, it makes me cry, it distracts me from the things that weigh me down and inspires me to keep trying. The internet is the reason I live on the West Coast now. The internet is the reason I know my best friend.

Above all the internet represents freedom to me. Freedom is one of the things that's most important to me, on a variety of levels. And I've never been able to stand it when people try to take it away.

I've signed petitions and written letters, and I don't know if it will do any good, but it's a damn sight better than doing nothing, and I encourage you all to do it too, or blog about it to raise awareness of SOPA and PIPA.